Where have I been?

Not that anyone is reading this-but for my own justification, I pretty much just checked out the last few weeks. I am teaching a class at Syracuse University. This rocks and I love it, but it is a lot of extra work on top of a full-time job and trying to keep up with spousal units, pets, family, friends & house stuff. The class ended on August 6th-now all I have to do is grade the final project and I am a free woman. Yeah!

I lost the weight I gained previously-I still blame it on the monthly crap. I have been good and I have been bad and I am at 318. Can't really make that positive, so I will just let it sit as it is.

I am snarky today-which I actually looked up because I like to invent words-nope, it really exists. Irritable or short-tempered; irascible. Patrons are just rubbing me the wrong way, I could hardly even smile when my love came bounding out to the car when I picked her up. Don't you just hate days like that? When you can't seem to do anything to get yourself out of the snark.

Irascible fluffy

Ok, here is my rant for the day. I have been positive and good this week-I have not denied myself everything I might want-but I have focused on good foods-lots of veggies and fruits and no pop.

The no pop thing is huge for me!! I love pop! I love the fizz and I hate diet pop. The best thing to happen in my world is a little thing called Diet Rite. It is sweetened with Splenda so the nasty aftertaste like diet coke has doesn't exist. It comes in fanciful flavors such as tangerine, white grape, kiwi strawberry and rasberry. This makes you feel as tho you are sipping on some lovely beverage in Paris as opposed to a diet drink in the midwest.

Anyways, I am digressing as I often do in a rant. I am doing ok-not perfect, but not bad. I even did some Tai Chi. Did I lose weight? No. Did I maintain? No. I freakin' gained 7 pounds in 2 days. I think I know why-water gain and monthly issues, but I just want to rub my Buddha belly and say "not this week, boy, not this week!"

Here is my food journal for the day:

Water-16 ounces
8 ounces light lemonade.
1 banana
1 weight watchers "smart carb" dinner
1/2 of a piece of coffee cake
10 grapes

Terrible isn't it?

~Fluffy the fluffier this week

Encouraging weight loss-NOT

Ok, here is my rant for the day. I have been positive and good this week-I have not denied myself everything I might want-but I have focused on good foods-lots of veggies and fruits and no pop.

The no pop thing is huge for me!! I love pop! I love the fizz and I hate diet pop. The best thing to happen in my world is a little thing called Diet Rite. It is sweetened with Splenda so the nasty aftertaste like diet coke has doesn't exist. It comes in fanciful flavors such as tangerine, white grape, kiwi strawberry and rasberry. This makes you feel as tho you are sipping on some lovely beverage in Paris as opposed to a diet drink in the midwest.

Anyways, I am digressing as I often do in a rant. I am doing ok-not perfect, but not bad. I even did some Tai Chi. Did I lose weight? No. Did I maintain? No. I freakin' gained 7 pounds in 2 days. I think I know why-water gain and monthly issues, but I just want to rub my Buddha belly and say "not this week, boy, not this week!"

Here is my food journal for the day:

Water-16 ounces
8 ounces light lemonade.
1 banana
1 weight watchers "smart carb" dinner
1/2 of a piece of coffee cake
10 grapes

Terrible isn't it?

~Fluffy the fluffier this week

Confessions

I suppose it is time to get serious about this. Tho, quickly I must say that I should have called myself the fluffly librarian because that is what I type in each and everytime I log in. *sigh*

OK! Here are my stats for the whole world to see. This is cathartic because, as the DMV knows, no one really tells the truth about how much they weigh. You may look like fat Albert, but by darn, your license says 150 so you feel better about yourself. Aren't we a bunch of messed up fluffy people?

I currently weigh 323 pounds. Whew. This is the highest that I have ever weighed. My previous high number was 319. At that point, I hit a big bad ugly time in my life, skidded into depression and lost 65 pounds. I vowed I would never get here again, but I did. It is a long story as to why that I will probably hit at a later date. As a friend told me last night, it isn't just the weight that you have to deal with-it is all the little "issues" that spoke out from the weight issue that hinder your ability to get it done.

I'm working on those issues now. I am not sure what it is going to take for me to lose the weight-I try lots of things, I start anew almost everyday-I just never last long.

I do pretty good for a fluffy girl-you would think I eat 5 steaks a day and never move. I am somewhat active-I just do better when I have scheduled rest times. I don't seem to eat that much-but I don't lose weight on what I eat. I am hungry almost all the time. I repeat, I am hungry almost all the time.

On that note, I am going to go eat a banana. :)

Fluffy

Tuesday Morning Danceroo

The day after a holiday is always tough on librarians. Patrons come in wanting to know if we enjoyed our lazy, sleepy day off as if we don't deserve any time off. There are books everywhere (I mean everywhere) and everyone scrambles to hold it together until we get caught up. If you have staff that work together with a spirit of comradery you will be ok. I do not have such a staff-ok, let me be fair, I have a great staff. It is the circulation department that has a few evil, whiny staff members that ruin it for everyone.

The day after a holiday is also tough on the person trying to get a start on her weight loss and used the weekend as an excuse to eat anything she wanted. *sigh* I feel like a slop of a pig today-ashamed, tired, feeling like I didn't have anytime off. Why? Because I ate too much all damned weekend and it makes me feel bad. Yet! The moment I slack off-I start having these amazing cravings.

I would kill for a jelly bean right now.

Fluffy

Dancing in the rain

An old Chinese proverb says, "may you live in interesting times." I see this as a curse this week more than anything. Between CIPA and my judgmental patrons I am about to flip. I will save CIPA for later, but will tell you a story about Tim before I am off for a three-day weekend sipping Marguaritas sitting in our kiddie pool.

Tim is a homeless man that frequents my library. He is mostly a gentle soul that wanders about and draws the staff beautiful pictures on the paper towels used to dry your hands in the bathroom. He looks at things differently than most and I enjoy that about him.

This last Wednesday night one of our more uptight patrons called the police on Tim because he was dancing in the rain out in the side parking lot. What is truly amazing is that the police actually came out to investigate. Since when is it a crime to dance in the rain? The police came in and searched his belongings to make sure he wasn't stealing anything of ours and escorted him off the property. I was appalled and wished I would have been there to raise a fuss about it.

Fluffyville-where it is against the law to happily dance in the rain. Aren't you glad you tuned in?